Indictment of a Father

Fathers, don't exasperate your children by coming down hard on them. Take them by the hand and lead them in the way of the Master. - Apostle Paul, Ephesians 6:4
“We are born in relationship, we are wounded in relationship, and we can be healed in relationship.” Harville Hendrix, “Getting the Love You Want”

INDICTMENT OF A FATHER...

Have you ever been on the receiving end of any of these statements?

  • “You always tell me I'm wrong.”
  • “I'm afraid you'll get mad if I tell you _______.”
  • “You always tell me I shouldn't ________.”
  • “I don't love Jesus and never have.”
  • “You're not safe to talk to.”
  • “I'm ______________!” (cutting, in jail, an alcoholic, a drug addict, a father (mother), homosexual, sex addict … )
  • “I hate you.”
  • “I'll never meet your expectations.”
  • “I'm moving in with my boy(girl) friend.”
  • “I'm always wrong and you're always right.”
  • “I'm leaving.”

It hurts to hear these comments from the broken hearts of our children. Especially when WE are the ones who have broken their hearts.

However, we live in a fallen broken world and we all have had their hearts broken in some way or another over time. Pain is part of growth, and walking through pain is part of healing.

Over the past year, I have heard almost every one of these statements from either one of my own children or from others. The statements tear into my heart. They rip into my soul with an indescribable powerlessness that tells me I am a failure as a father. I am devastated as I repeat to myself... “I have failed as a father.”

But then I remember the Grace and Truth of Jesus Christ for me, for my children and for others. There is an intersection of Grace, Truth and Time where internal healing is free to happen.

This is when I can begin to hear from the Holy Spirit...

"I am a child of God."

"I am free to follow Jesus."

"I am washed by the blood of Jesus."

"Jesus' burden is light."

"I am loved by God...unconditionally."

“I am worthy to be called a son of God.”

Healing doesn't come quickly. But, I am impatient; I want it now; I want the pain to stop; I want what I want when I want it.

But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. - 2 Corinthians 12:9

SEPTEMBER...finishing out the summer

• Climbed South Sister (10,358 ft) with the family

• Chad and Brian attended Oregon vs. Tennessee (59 – 14)...first college football game ever.

• Launched a new website for The Shepherd's House http://myshepherdshouse.org/

• Launched a new website for Grace Network International http://gracenetworkintl.org/

• Baptized 2 men from The Shepherd's House

• Have raised $61k so far for the kitchen remodel project at The Shepherd's House

Thank you...you continue to make these things possible. Thank you for your support and for your prayers.